It’s mid January. Far enough in to the new year that some people have already fallen off the band wagon on their new year resolutions. If you’re one of them, commiserations. Just\u00a0know this: you aren’t alone.<\/p>\n
I\u00a0resolved late last year that I was\u00a0going to write in a gratitude journal more often. Like every-single-day. Then last night I realised that the last time I got it out was over a week ago before I flew back to Australia from the USA (travel does that!) \u00a0While I could sit here beating up on myself (or making excuses), I also know that my ‘setback’ is something many others have also had by now (only 10% of people ever stick to\u00a0their new year resolutions!)<\/p>\n
The truth is that starting new habits, and changing old patterns of behaviour, is hard. So too is staying the course toward big\u00a0goals – particularly when you’re not quite sure how to achieve them! \u00a0Heck if it were easy to start getting up an hour earlier every morning to exercise, eating only clean foods or carving a half hour out of your day to meditate, everyone would be doing it.<\/p>\n
It’s for this reason that I want to share with you some strategies to help you make changes that stick and to ‘get back on the\u00a0horse’ if\/when you fall\u00a0off. \u00a0I hope a few will hit home and help you make the year ahead that much\u00a0better and bigger than it would have been otherwise.<\/p>\n
1. Decide\u00a0what you want (like what you REALLY<\/em> want!)<\/strong><\/p>\n You wouldn’t start out on a journey with no idea where you were going. Likewise you need to set your compass (or GPS!) on whatever it is that you truly want. \u00a0I mean, how can you create your ideal \u2018dream life\u2019 if you aren\u2019t sure what it actually looks like. A lot of people I speak to have no idea.\u00a0\u00a0 So before you do anything else, give yourself some empty time with a blank page to map out what a truly extraordinary life looks like for you \u2013 physically, financially, spiritually, emotionally, in your relationships, the work you do and the impact you make. Creating an inspiring vision for the future you want provides a compass to guide you forward \u2013 what to steer toward and what to steer away from.\u00a0 As the old saying goes, if you don\u2019t know where you\u2019re going, you may end up someplace you don\u2019t much like.<\/p>\n 2. Know\u00a0your big ‘Why’!\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n The reason a lot of people don’t stay on course toward their goals is because they haven’t linked them to a big enough “Why.” So get crystal clear about why it is so important for you to do whatever it is you’ve committed to. \u00a0What lies at stake if you don\u2019t? If it\u2019s not meaningful enough, you won\u2019t stay the course when the going gets tough or life gets in the way. My\u00a0‘Why’ behind my gratitude journal is simply to help me become a more grateful person and to make focusing on what I do have (over what I don’t) my habitual ‘default’ mode!<\/p>\n 3. Step into action (even if you’re not\u00a0exactly sure what you’re doing!)\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n It\u2019s easy to live with excuses and justifications about why you can\u2019t do what you want, at least not now. Maybe later. Next year perhaps. But inaction exacts an increasingly steep toll on our lives. Nothing is a more powerful antidote to fear than action. Daily action. Massive action! \u00a0Start talking to people. Extend an invitation. Risk a rejection. Ask for an introduction. Introduce yourself to an influencer. Offer your services. Get your finances in order. Ask for help. Learn a skill. Read a biography. Hire a coach. Join a group. JUST DO SOMETHING. Every. Single. Day. Above all, don’t wait until you know everything before you do something!<\/p>\n 4. Reframe problems.<\/strong><\/p>\n So you\u2019ve got problems \u2013 the tough economy, a difficult boss, your company\u2019s culture, unsupportive family, too little resources\/education\/experience\/finances (or lack thereof). Join the boat! It\u2019s not your problems that keep you from creating what you want, it\u2019s the story you tell yourself about them. Likewise, when you encounter a set back or slip up (like me and my journalling), don’t make up a story that you’re doomed for failure or don’t have the discipline or smarts or _______ (fill in the blank) to succeed. That’s just a big bloody story. Rather decide you just haven’t mastered it yet, and get back to work. Life will always present problems and setbacks. Don’t let them define you.<\/p>\n 5. Watch your words. Rewrite your\u00a0(limiting)\u00a0stories.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n You don\u2019t see the world as it is, but as you are. Accordingly,\u00a0the words you use to describe your present, past, or future\u00a0create the reality you inhabit.\u00a0If you cast yourself as a helpless victim, you\u2019ll be just that. If you cast yourself as the master of your fate, you\u2019ll be that too. \u00a0If you’re constantly talking about the all the risks, you’ll live forever in fear. And if you label yourself hopeless or disorganised or lazy or too timid that’s exactly who you’ll be. So choose your words wisely and tell stories that fuel bravery\u00a0and expand what is possible for you, not shrink it.<\/p>\n 6. \u00a0Find\u00a0your \u2018A team.\u2019<\/strong><\/p>\n In my interview with seven times world champion surfer Layne Beachley, we discussed\u00a0about how important it is to surround yourself with the right people (and avoid the wrong ones which Layne calls “Dream Thieves.” \u00a0That’s because, for better or worse, the quality of your\u00a0life is a direct reflection of\u00a0the expectations of the people around you. \u00a0It’s hard to dream big and take risks to make them reality if everyone around you is content with the status quo.\u00a0\u00a0So if the people you\u2019re hanging out with aren\u2019t encouraging you to pursue the goals that excite you and bringing out your best \u00a0then its likely they are derailing you from moving toward the very things you want most (your ambition may well be threatening to them!) The solution: move on! \u00a0Hanging out with “friends”\u00a0you’ve outgrown from\u00a0some misguided\u00a0sense of loyalty serves no-one. Rather be intentional in spending more time with the kind of people you’d like to me more like; people who won’t\u00a0settle for mediocrity and who want nothing less for you!\u00a0As I wrote in Brave<\/em>, “Walk with giants. They’ll make you grow bigger.”<\/p>\n